Monday, September 18, 2006

Top 5 Ways to GAIN Body Fat

by Rachel Cosgrove

Are you looking to put on a little extra pudge to keep warm? Maybe your boyfriend or husband wants to see "more" of you? How can you put on that extra layer of fat you've always wanted to fill out your jeans?

Follow these five recommendations and you'll be on your way!

1. Do long, slow aerobic exercise every day.

The more aerobics you do, the more your metabolism can slow down, the more efficient your body will be at storing fat, especially if you're looking to gain some size on your thighs!

Recommendation: Go to the gym every single day and find a treadmill or Stairmaster where you can watch TV while you're working out. After all, you're going to be there for a while. Do at least an hour per day, seven days per week at a very steady state (you should be able to carry on a conversation easily the entire workout).

Why it works to store fat: Your body will actually use fat as fuel during this workout (you should be in the "fat burning zone") which will create the perfect effect we want for the other 23 hours of the day - fat storing mode. Yes, your body will adapt to become efficient at storing fat.

This workout will do nothing to increase your metabolism either. You'll burn off muscle, decreasing your lean muscle mass, and actually slow down your metabolism. So get to the gym and start spending countless hours doing aerobics, burning off muscle, and turning your body into a fat storing machine! This is a perfect way to gain some body fat!

2. Follow a low fat, low calorie diet... and don't drink any water.

The less you eat, the lower your metabolism will go, which is optimal for storing body fat.
Recommendation: Keep your calories very low and deprive your body. Keep your calories around 1000-1200 per day (which is starving) and don't eat more than 15 to 20 grams of fat per day. You want your body to think it's starving so it'll hold on to body fat at all costs. Also, don't drink any water. Drink juice instead; it'll work wonders for expanding your waistline.

Why it works to store body fat: Every time you eat, your metabolism goes up. This isn't good when you're trying to store fat. Eating enough food will fuel fat burning, the opposite of what we want. You want your body to be in fat storing mode, which is best accomplished by depriving it.

Also, count your fat grams and keep your dietary fat levels low. This will teach your body to hold on to fat, another excellent method for putting on that extra adipose tissue (body fat)! And drinking water will only cause you to drop any excess water you're holding, therefore keep the water consumption low to keep you fat and bloated!

3. Avoid weight training at all costs!

Increasing your lean body mass is the best way to increase your metabolism to burn fat. So stay away from any weight training!

Recommendation: Don't touch the weights in the gym. Or, if you do, only lift ones that are small enough not to build any muscle (you know the ones - the little pink dumbbells in the ladies-only room).

Why it works to store fat: The goal is to keep your metabolism as low as possible to turn your body into a fat storing machine. Any lean muscle would be bad news when you're trying to gain fat because it would increase your metabolism and cause you to burn more calories! Also, weight training will raise your metabolism for the next 24 to 48 hours, which will never work to get that body fat up!

4. Eat only 1-2 meals a day!

Eating meals less frequently is a great way to keep your metabolism in the gutter all day long and will be ideal for storing fat.

Recommendation: The less often you eat, the better. If you can distract yourself all day and skip a couple of meals, you'll set yourself up perfectly to store fat. And never eat breakfast to assure that you start your day off in a fat storing mode. For best results, don't eat anything until dinner and then just eat the one meal before you fast again overnight.

Why this works to store fat: Again, every time you eat, your metabolism increases. If you skip a meal, your metabolism will drop, and if you skip more then one meal you can get that metabolism running very slow - perfect for storing body fat. Having a sluggish metabolism is ideal if you want to put on the chub, and this is a great way to achieve it.

5. Perform the exact same workout over and over without ever increasing the intensity.

Doing the same workout each time will confirm that you haven't become any stronger or more fit, but instead have stayed exactly the same or become worse.

Recommendation: Go to the gym every day and do the exact same thing. Get on the same cardio machine, in front of the same television, and walk the same speed everyday.
Why this works to store fat: This will ensure that you don't gain any lean body mass and that your workout won't limit your fat storing capabilities. You don't ever want to push yourself harder than you're used to.

Follow these guidelines to an all new, plumper you!

Wait just a darn minute...

Hold on. You say you want to lose body fat? Oh, okay, then make sure you aren't making the mistake of following any of the above guidelines! You'd actually want to do the exact opposite of each of the above rules to see a leaner physique in the mirror.

For a leaner, sexier you:

1) Do interval training instead of steady state aerobics to increase your metabolism and get your body revving to burn fat all day long. So, instead of walking on a treadmill at the same pace for 30 minutes, you'd walk two minutes then run for a minute or two, then walk again. Alternate between high and low intensity. You can do the same on an exercise bike or whatever activity you choose. This works extremely well for fat loss!

2) Fuel your body with high quality protein, complex carbohydrates, and good fats. Your calories should not drop below 1400 to 1500 per day and your fat intake should be 30% of your diet. This will keep your metabolism burning hot - perfect for fat loss.

3) Lift weights and don't be afraid to push yourself beyond what you're used to; that's how you get your body to change for the better. Every ounce of muscle you put on will increase your metabolism and keep you in a constant fat burning state! And remember, weight training doesn't make women big; it makes them firm.

4) Eat 5-6 meals a day. Every time you eat, your metabolism goes up, so eat something healthy every couple of hours to keep your body revved up to burn fat.

5) Change your workout every 4-6 weeks. Your body will adapt and you'll need a change to create a new stimulus to continue building muscle and burning fat!

May you reach all your goals and get the body of your dreams! Stay focused!

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